Birds, Boats, and Past Loves


oh im sorry i didnt see you there i was too busy mmmmmmmmblockin out the haters

Jul 22 380,694 plays / 56,793 notes


ok dude, i know you wanna fuck the granny queen from a bugs life, we’ve gotten your confession 385 fucking times, we get it, you love fucking old wrinkly ass ants, stop fucking submitting it.

Jul 22 / 138,466 notes
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do well in school kids, because if you do you might become an astronaut and get to leave the god-forsaken shitscape of earth for good

Jul 21 / 732 notes
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if anyone ever calls you a slut just say ‘and yet i still won’t fuck you’ and then blow them a kiss as you saunter away because that’s the closest they’re ever gonna get to your magnificence, o smaug, chiefest and greatest of calamaties

Ladies real talk

Jul 21 / 396,525 notes
So I was doing my physics homework



and one of the questions said this

If a moose were chasing you through the woods, its enormous mass would be very threatening.  But if you zigzagged, then its great mass would be to your advantage. 

So naturally I thought of this


There’s a reason Kevin Tran was in Advanced Placement.

Jul 21 / 124,215 notes

and that’s how you retell a fairytale

do you ever see a picture of your internet friend for the first time and you just kinda think
it appears i have accidentally befriended a beauty goddess.

(Source: muftiday)

Jul 20 / 170,334 notes


um how do i get skinny by tomorrow

Jul 20 / 183,179 notes



Bless that one person in every group that is like “keep going, I’m listening” and encourages you to finish your story even when everyone else is talking over you.

Jul 20 / 122,005 notes
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